It has been on my heart for awhile to write a post like this one. God has really been working in my heart to share with others what my singleness means to me.
So many people in my life desperately want me to get married. My mother, sister #1, my 93 year old grandmother, my mother's friends. And I would like to get married too. But more than that I want God. I want to follow Him above all else. I want to honor Him, I want to be a light to those who don't know Him.
What a lot of people who have not been single in a long time, or maybe never experienced singleness in their 20s, don't seem to understand or remember is that singleness is a gift. Singleness is not just a horrible, miserable existence where you always feel alone and have low self esteem and wonder if you will ever get married. Singleness is a time where you have no commitment to a spouse or children and can pretty much do whatever you want. But if you are walking with Jesus He can really use that time to mold you and grow you and stretch you to be who He created you to be. It is a time like no other that only lasts for awhile before you spend the rest of your life (God-willing) committed to another person. I know that I would not be where I am in my walk if I had been married already. There is nothing wrong with marriage, but God has used my singleness to bring me to a point where I have to fully rely on Him for everything. I am not alone because I have Him. I am financially broke but He somehow always provides the finances I need. Sometimes it seems like life would be so much easier if I just had a husband, but I have realized recently how God is trying to get me to utterly rely and trust on Him because He is the one in control.
Through my singleness I have also realized over many, many years the value I have in Christ. My value is not found in another person, it is found in Him. I know that I am "fearfully and wonderfully made" (Psalm 139), that I am saved by grace, that God never gives up on me, and regardless of any circumstances I will always be a child of God. There is no other way to find value in yourself other than to find it in Him. Trying to find it anywhere else (friendships, dating, physical appearance, material things, etc.) will get you nowhere.
Ultimately I believe God knows the desire of my heart and He wants to bring me joy in marriage, that He has created me to be a helper to someone, and when the time is right and the man is right HE will make it happen. I am not worried at all. Most days. Anytime I start to doubt He always does something small to remind me that He has it under control.
I also told my mother tonight that I think God is going to keep me single until her and everybody else who is worried gets the lesson God has been trying to teach them about trusting Him with my singleness and being PATIENT. =)
3 comments:
Yep! Some people say that marraige brings "maturity", which implies that single people just can't be mature until they're married. Try paying all your bills by yourself. Handling all your car problems by yourself. Finding a place to live by yourself. Etc. That. breeds. maturity. We have all we need for life and godliness, and it's not found in another human...EVER. - Allison (Sister #2)
This is amazing. Inspiration to me. I don't know how I stummbled across this but I thank God I did. People just don't unerstand there's more in life. I'm 25 a single virgin male and its hard not to fall into that temptation. Good luck with everything and God Bless.
I am so glad God was able to use this to encourage you. Thanks for your comment.
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